Me and Minnie are not world travellers by any stretch of the imagination. A trip into Sydney is a big deal, really. Last Christmas Minnie was lookin’ for somethin’ in particular and she decided to try her luck out at the Sydney River Wal-mart. She talked about it for two days, made a big plan and …
Category Archives: Big Billy
Big Billy – They call it puppy love
Our dog, Smiley Bates, is a bit of a charmer. In case ya never seen him, the reason he got his name is, any time ya look at him, his little beagle mouth always looks like he got a great big smile on his face. He looks like the cat who ate the canary, even …
Big Billy – Pickin’ wedgies
Oh, stop at the store, she says. It won’t take long, she says. Normally when we’re drivin’ along and Minnie says that, I roll out one of my go-to excuses. I hate goin’ to the grocery store, so I’ll usually say – Maybe you should drop me off home first, cuz I gotta go to the bathroom somethin’ …
Big Billy – The Stanley Cup(cake)
Minnie made cupcakes and so help me God, I don’t know if I’m gonna survive. Usually when she makes somethin’ like this – date squares or molasses cookies or rocky Big BIllyroad squares or anything like that – I can get by all right if I respect her three day rule. She just expects I’m gonna …
Big Billy – No trades-ies, pardner
Remember years ago when Swap Shop was on the radio? Holy cripes, buddy, I was the king of Swap Shop. I was all business. In case you’re too young to remember, every afternoon on the radio, they had this show where ya could call in and tell everybody you were tryin’ to sell somethin’. It was …
Big Billy – True blue hockey fans
The jig’s up, so I might as well let yis know I got a secret weapon that pretty much guarantees the Leafs are gonna win the Cup. [Full story]
Big Billy – Put ‘em up
I know I told yis before, my buddy Murph got an awful temper, but the truth is he’s a lot tamer now than he used to be. The other day me and all the fellas are at Horton’s for our morning coffee – me and Murph and Cyril and Timmy and Tommy – and we’re …
Big Billy – Too much information
Now, I’m a man. So, one of the worst things I can imagine is gettin’ stuck in line at a grocery store. Which is why I try to get out of goin’ to the grocery store every chance I get. Or, if Minnie somehow tricks me into goin’ along with her, I make sure I …
Big Billy – A dog-eat-dog world
I used to think I was the biggest heavy garbage hound around, but that was before I seen my buddy Timmy in action. [Read more]
Big Billy – Who’s your daddy?
Minnie loves them crazy talk shows, like where fifteen guys all get a blood test to see which one’s the father of some poor jug-eared little baby. And it’s not like I go lookin’ for them on TV or anything, but if I come in the room and she got one of them on, I don’t …
John McNeil 